The Best Anecdotes & Quotations 2025

1. 1,000 Unforgettable Senior Moments : Of Which We Could Remember Only 246

No, you're not losing your mind. And you're definitely not alone. There's Jimmy Carter, forgetting the nuclear launch codes in a suit at the dry cleaners. Rod Stewart fumbling for the name of the intense first love who inspired " Maggie Mae." G. K. Chesterton writing a long letter to his mother announcing the good news about his engagement-- while his mother is in the room with him. Marilyn Monroe blowing the same line through 52 takes during the filming of "Some Like It Hot. Celebrating history's greatest mental lapses, is a perfect impulse book in the fine gift format of "Famous Last Words. Not just outlandishly funny, it's also a book of great comfort-- after all, having a senior moment puts you in the company of Einstein, Lincoln, Beethoven, Newton, Toscanini, and a whole assortment of presidents, poets, philosophers, popes, and Nobel Prize- winners. Talk about gaffes. Here are best men forgetting to show up at the wedding. Judges staggered by the incompetence of their previous decisions. Senators frozen in front of TV cameras. Olympic officials gazing absently while bewildered runners continue through the finish line. Bono losing the only copy of his lyrics to a new album. Forget to pick up your copy today!

No, you’re not losing your mind. And you’re definitely not alone. There’s Jimmy Carter, forgetting the nuclear launch codes in a suit at the dry cleaners. Rod Stewart fumbling for the name of the intense first love who inspired “Maggie Mae.” G. K. Chesterton writing a long letter to hismother announcing the good news about his engagement—while his mother is in the room with him. Marilyn Monroe blowing the same line through 52 takes during the filming of Some Like It Hot. Celebrating history’s greatest mental lapses, is a perfect impulse book in the fine gift format of Famous Last Words. Not just outlandishly funny, it’s also a book of great comfort—after all, having a senior moment puts you in the company of Einstein, Lincoln, Beethoven, Newton, Toscanini, and a whole assortment of presidents, poets, philosophers, popes, and Nobel Prize–winners. Talk about gaffes. Here are best men forgetting to show up at the wedding. Judges staggered by the incompetence of their previous decisions. Senators frozen in front of TV cameras. Olympic officials gazing absently while bewildered runners continue through the finish line. Bono losing the only copy of his lyrics to a new album. Forget to pick up your copy today!

2. The Quotable A**hole : More Than 1,200 Bitter Barbs, Cutting Comments, and Caustic Comebacks for Aspiring and Armchair A**holes Alike (Paperback)

Readers will find more than 1,200 of the most biting quotes, comments, and comebacks ever uttered. They'll also see what happens when practically perfect folks like Walt Disney, Mahatma Ghandi, and Audrey Hepburn lose their cool. Whoever said, sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you never met an a**hole. Here, you'll find more than 1,200 of the most biting quotes, comments, and comebacks ever uttered, including: I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would be an affront to your intelligence. --George Bernard Shaw Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. --Albert Einstein If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you. --Muhammed Ali You won't just find quotes from typical a**holes like Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, and Mark Twain, either. You'll also see what happens when practically perfect folks like Walt Disney, Mahatma Ghandi, and Audrey Hepburn lose their cool. So embrace your dark side and get ready to enjoy every over-confident, over-blown, over-the-top a**hole comment you'll ever need.

Whoever said, "sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you" never met an a**hole. Here, you'll find more than 1,200 of the most biting quotes, comments, and comebacks ever uttered, including: "I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would be an affront to your intelligence." --George Bernard Shaw "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein "If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you." --Muhammed Ali You won't just find quotes from typical a**holes like Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, and Mark Twain, either. You'll also see what happens when practically perfect folks like Walt Disney, Mahatma Ghandi, and Audrey Hepburn lose their cool. So embrace your dark side and get ready to enjoy every over-confident, over-blown, over-the-top a**hole comment you'll ever need.

3. The Big Book of Duh : A Bathroom Book (Paperback)

If you are stupid, then you're too dumb to know it. If you're smart, then you are no doubt smart enough to doubt yourself. --Bob Fenster The Big Book of Duh! is the perfect read regardless of where you happen to be sitting--think Uncle John's Bathroom Reader meets The Darwin Awards (without any of the dreary dead stuff). Proving there is a lot of reading going on in suburbia's smallest room, more than 1.5 million copies of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader have been sold since its first publication in 1988. As the new water-closet contender, Bob Fenster continues his romp into areas of idiot intrigue by chronicling the folly and reckless abandon of the human race. * Covering such topics as My Favorite Morons, It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, The Surprising Things People Don't Know, and Dumb Plays in the Face of Fate, this compendium chronicles the densely inept and decidedly ignorant. * Featuring outrageous new stories plus the best material from the previous Duh! books, this compilation is the ultimate collection of human stupidity.

If you are stupid, then you're too dumb to know it. If you're smart, then you are no doubt smart enough to doubt yourself. --Bob Fenster The Big Book of Duh! is the perfect read regardless of where you happen to be sitting--think Uncle John's Bathroom Reader meets The Darwin Awards (without any of the dreary dead stuff). Proving there is a lot of reading going on in suburbia's smallest room, more than 1.5 million copies of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader have been sold since its first publication in 1988. As the new water-closet contender, Bob Fenster continues his romp into areas of idiot intrigue by chronicling the folly and reckless abandon of the human race. * Covering such topics as My Favorite Morons, It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, The Surprising Things People Don't Know, and Dumb Plays in the Face of Fate, this compendium chronicles the densely inept and decidedly ignorant. * Featuring outrageous new stories plus the best material from the previous Duh! books, this compilation is the ultimate collection of human stupidity.

4. Madame Bovary, c'est Moi : The Great Characters of Literature and Where They Came From, Used [Hardcover]

A delightful compendium of wit and information, this book takes us on a casual stroll through literary history as the world's most successful writers sought just the right name, or just the right tone, or just the right prop, for the hero or heroine of their works.How did Nero Wolfe in Fer-de-Lance by Rex Stout end up with the name of a Roman emperor? Was Tolstoy's Anna Karenina based on a real person? Why was Hercule Poirot, the great inspector in the mysteries of Agatha Christie, a Belgian rather than a Frenchman? Why was Long John Silver missing a foot? Under what circumstances did J. R. R. Tolkien conceive of a "hobbit"? In this charming collection of anecdotes, we are taken to the very heart of the mystery of literary creation. For as Virginia Woolf once wrote, "If the characters are real the novel will have a chance."

Madame Bovary, c'est Moi : The Great Characters of Literature and Where They Came From, Used [Hardcover]

5. Book of Musical Anecdotes [Paperback - Used]

CONDITION - USED - Pages can include limited notes and highlighting, and the copy can include "From the library of" labels or previous owner inscriptions. Accessories such as CD, codes, toys, may not be included. Here is one of the most enjoyable and illuminating books ever published for the music lover, a feast of delightful anecdotes that reveal the all-too-human side of the great composers and performers. There are stories of appetites (Handel eating dinner for three), embarrassments (Brahms falling asleep as Liszt plays), oddities (Bruckner's dog being trained to howl at Wagner), and devotions (a lovely admirer disrobing in tribute to Puccini). There are memorable accounts of Stravinsky telling Proust how much he hates Beethoven, of Tchaikovsky's first bewildering telephone call, of Dvorak's strange love of pigeons, and of Verdi's intricate maneuvering to keep the now-famous melody of "La donna ? mobile" top secret. There is also wonderful trivia (Beethoven loved to cat "bread soup" made with ten raw eggs), along with eccentric strategies (Verdi, disturbed by the sound of street organs playing arias from his operas, hired them all for a season and kept them locked in a room). There are examples of musicians munificent generosity (Haydn called Mozart "the greatest composer known to me, either in person or by name"), and scathing dismissal ("Have you heard any Stockhausen?" the conductor Sir Thomas Beecham was asked. "No," he replied, "but I believe I have trodden in some"). Collected from thousands of books, articles, and unpublished manuscripts (with historical sources provided in extensive notes), these anecdotes appear in their original form, throwing fresh light on familiar figures in the musical hall of fame. For browsing, reading, research and amusement, this book is a grand entertainment for concert-goers, record-buyers, operamanes, gossips and music lovers everywhere.

Book of Musical Anecdotes [Paperback - Used]

6. Pre-Owned Maybe Swearing Will Help: Adult Coloring Book (Paperback 9780996764131) by Nyx Spectrum

9780996764131. Pre-Owned: Good condition. Trade paperback. Language: English. Pages: 64. Trade paperback (US). Glued binding. 64 p. Maybe Swearing will Help is the perfect adult coloring book for those with a sense of humor and a bit of a foul mouth. This adult coloring book features funny pages with quotes of motivation, puns, and cursing for anyone to calm down with. From moderate designs to complex detailed images this book features a wide range of styles, cussing included. Enjoy therapeutic animals, tasty treats, elegant floral patterns, trendy word art and elaborate abstract designs to relax with. Each page brings a new sassy element to this form of art therapy and deserves a chuckle or two. Many designs feature animals including: Fox, Birds, Sheep, Bee, Whale, Fish, Puppies and more. Other pages include: Food, Pastries, Fruit, Ice Cream, Perfume Bottle, Bike and more! Enjoy pages featuring sayings: "Lady with the vocabulary of a Sailor", "Wine down for what" and "Zen AF". CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE. NOT INTENDED FOR CHILDREN.

Pre-Owned Maybe Swearing Will Help: Adult Coloring Book (Paperback 9780996764131) by Nyx Spectrum

7. Wit, Used [Hardcover]

Like John Train's Most Remarkable Occurrences, this beautifully packaged gift book is tailor-made for lovers of "irreference" books.

Wit, Used [Hardcover]

8. Pre-Owned Kids Say the Darndest Things to Santa Claus: 25 Years of Santa Stories Paperback

Our books are pre-loved which means they have been read before. We carefully check all our books and believe them to be in good condition. If you're not completely satisfied please get in touch & we'll be happy to help. ISBN-10: 1543980244 ISBN-13: 9781543980240

ISBN-10: 1543980244 ISBN-13: 9781543980240 Our books are pre-loved which means they have been read before. We carefully check all our books and believe them to be in good condition. If you're not completely satisfied please get in touch & we'll be happy to help.

9. An Anthropologist On Mars, Used [Hardcover]

To these seven narratives of neurological disorder Dr. Sacks brings the same humanity, poetic observation, and infectious sense of wonder that are apparent in his bestsellers Awakenings and The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat . These men, women, and one extraordinary child emerge as brilliantly adaptive personalities, whose conditions have not so much debilitated them as ushered them into another reality.

An Anthropologist On Mars, Used [Hardcover]

10. Crazy Sh*t Old People Say

Details Coming Soon

Wise, offensive, whatever you want to call it, old people take no prisoners as they dissect modern life and the younger generations: "Life's a b*tch. Deal with it." Under the guise of passing on their experience to family members, neighbors, or even casual acquaintances, older folks exercise their right to swear, cuss, and insult as they please. This humorous collection of wisdom from our elders will prove that with increasing age and grey hair comes a newfound confidence to speak one's mind.